A hilarious masked caper

They had to be drunk, didn't they? God I hope so. These two clever fiends drew their own masks to burgle an apartment in Iowa.

Ananova reports:

Two burglary suspects who drew 'masks' on their faces with a permanent marker pen have been arrested in the US.

A witness told police that two men with painted disguises were trying to break into an apartment in Carroll, Iowa.

Police soon spotted a 1994 Buick Roadmaster that matched the vehicle description and stopped it. They found two occupants with mask-like scribbling on faces, Iowa's Daily Times Herald reported.

Matthew Allan McNelly, 23, and Joey Lee Miller, 20, were arrested at gunpoint because of reports they might be armed, but neither man had a weapon.

Whip It

Watch it because:

• Juliet Lewis is awesome as the bitchy captain of the opposing team
• it's all about girl-power – tough chicks who bruise but don't cry
• lots of warm and fuzzy friendship themes
• awesome skater pseudonyms: Babe Ruthless, Smashley Simpson, Bloody Holly
• some very good acting – except Drew Barrymore, who seemed to mistake this for a stoner movie and overplays her part (funny considering she actually directed it)
• Maeby Funke appears as Bliss's best friend, Pash

Miss it because:

• there's nothing particularly new: underdogs make good, girl comes of age
• the emo love interest, which is kinda sweet but still... you know, emo
• with the co$t of movie tickets, you could easily wait for the dvd

The Bride Stripped Bare, Anonymous (Nikki Gemmell)

The Bride Stripped Bare delivers what the title promises: complete and explicit disclosure on the most intimate thoughts of a new bride. After overhearing a conversation implicating her husband in an affair with her best friend, the anonymous bride (whom everyone considers 'the good wife') embarks on a journey of sexual liberation in some pretty lit-erotic scenes.

The book purports to be a manuscript written by the bride, a modern day parallel to a sixteenth century text called Woman's Worth, also a manuscript of liberation written by an anonymous housewife. Using a very intimate second-person narration (‘Your husband doesn't know you're writing this. It's quite easy to write it under his nose. Just as easy, perhaps, as sleeping with other people.’) in a series of 'lessons' (instead of chapters), the writing is lyrical and even almost poetic at times. It conveys the sensitivity and insecurities of the anonymous bride, even as she revels in living out her sexual fantasies in a range of illicit activities.

The author (now outed as Nikki Gemmell) said she published the book as anonymous because it allowed her to write without reservation or embarrassment (although she's now had plenty of both, as well as royalties to boot). I can see why that might be – it’s easy to assume that she’s channeling her own sexual fantasies and living vicariously through her character. But to her credit, the book has more depth than just ‘the sex parts’. The bride struggles to contain her conflicting desires – her love for her husband (who doesn’t fulfill her sexually) and engaging in an adulterous affair (which meets her every sexual need) – and it is this internal struggle that lies at the core of The Bride Stripped Bare. It's the age old question of Madonna or whore – submissive wife or sexual aggressor – told using a different perspective.

One big thing that I don't think works in this book is the 'grab' that sandwiches the contents – we are informed that the bride has suddenly disappeared. It's intriguing at first, but ultimately it's a flimsy device that doesn't quite have the intended effect because her disappearance isn't anchored to any event in the book, leaving us with a big ‘huh?’ at the end.

The Bride Stripped Bare is like reading the journal of an extremely insecure and confused 30-something woman – something that many chicklit readers may relate to and enjoy. Personally I couldn't relate to the character's point in life at all, but still enjoyed the book. Recommended.

One Day, David Nicholls

This is a big novel, in both length and content, but very easy to read. Spanning two decades in the lives of Emma and Dexter, One Day opens on their first night together after their university graduation, and revisits them each year on the same day for the next 20 years.

This is much more than the usual short period of courting followed by the inevitable get together that you see in most books or movies about relationships – instead you get the whole deal. Career highs and lows, yearnings that go unsatisfied for years, the idealism of youth, the cynicism of disappointment, and the onset of middle-age. Nicholls takes you right inside the characters where everything is exposed. They become your best friends and you get to know them more intimately than most fictional characters – they really get into your skin.

Dexter is cocky, good-looking and confident while Emma is less sure of herself – passionate, idealistic and utterly in love with Dexter while trying desperately to hide it. Their trajectories touch and skim and weave in and out through the years, and through it all, there's a strong magnetism that holds them together – friendship, yearning, goodwill and love. It's not soppy in any way – if anything it's too real. It's a funny book, well written and very enjoyable, and very very moving. It's not a 'tear jerker' but you will cry. And then it'll stay with you when you turn the last page and wish for more.

The Spellman Files, Lisa Lutz

I like my comedies funny, and bookwise, they don't get much funnier than this. The kooky Spellmans are a family of private investigators (Spellman Investigations) who are completely and utterly endearing. Mum and Dad Spellman fell in love over a stake-out many years ago and the kids grew up learning how to pick locks, tail suspects and solve mysteries.

Lisa Lutz's narrative voice is pitch-perfect as Izzy (Isabelle) Spellman, 30-year old wild-child with a perfect lawyer brother and adorably precocious younger sister. Izzy considers herself the family screw-up, but it's obvious to see the PI genes run thick in her blood, as she's not afraid to get into some tough corners to solve a case.

You'd be excused in thinking that Izzy may have ADHD, because the book has chapters and sections that seem to jump all over the place, but the underlying thread being unravelled is the story of the Spellmans through Izzy's eyes, and her place in the family. When baby sister Rae goes missing, she is launched into the most personal case of her life.

The Spellman Files is highly recommended if you like a laugh and are in the mood for a quick and funny read. There are two sequels: Curse of the Spellmans and Revenge of the Spellmans, both of which I've ordered from the Book Depository, so expect to hear more about the Spellmans from me.

You may also enjoy:

• The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency, Alexander McCall-Smith
• The Stephanie Plum series, Janet Evanovich

Heliopolis, James Scudamore

Heliopolis is a gritty book told from the point of view of Ludo dos Santos, a baby born in the slums, who eventually becomes adopted by one of the wealthiest families in São Paulo. Straddling the chasm between the two classes, Ludo's is a mind that is not at ease with his good fortune. He, more than ever, recognises the fucked up state of the world, where people from the favela (city slums) struggle for scraps while the rich avoid traffic by flying overhead in personal helicopters, which has a particularly personal bearing on him as he struggles with a sense of unbelonging.

The story is well paced and interesting, and the rich, teeming pulse of São Paulo is as strong a character in this novel as any of the human-characters. However the real revelation is in the writing. James Scudamore is a brilliant writer. No other way to put it. From the first page you understand that you're in the hands of a master. He can take the reader where he wants us to go, so our journey takes us into the twists and turns of the struggling mind and partially-formed identity of Ludo, who is spared from being spoiled (despite all his money and opportunities) by his self-doubt, constant self-scrutiny and lack of identity. Alternating chapters take us from his present world (sleeping with his married adopted sister, working in a job he hates, accidentally inciting a shooting) to glimpses of his past, and wondering about the mysterious father he never knew.

Heliopolis is a book about identity and belonging, written by a truly talented young writer. It's messed up but beautiful in its own way, as we see Ludo try to make sense of his place in the world.

Gave me a laugh today